I’m a woman in the Southern Baptist Convention (SBC). Let me get more specific— I grew up & was saved + baptized in an SBC church. My husband is a pastor at an SBC church. I have a degree from an SBC seminary. So basically, my SBC roots run deep. 

And I want to shout loud + clear: I joyfully believe that Scripture calls only men to be pastors/elders/overseers. 

Scripture is clear on this issue (1 Tim. 2:12, 3:1-7; Titus 1:5-8). There are already tons of books, articles, etc., diving into these passages. That’s not necessarily my point here. Instead, I want to shed some light on some of the issues I see in this whole complementarian/egalitarian conversation (especially as we approach the SBC Annual Meeting next week!).

Different doesn’t mean less-than. Complementarians believe men and women are equal in value, but different in role. The world wants to pit women and men against each other, but that’s not Biblical. The differences God gives us are beautiful, and in His good design, the differences work together for the unified purpose of His Kingdom.

The SBC isn’t trying to devalue women. Again, different doesn’t mean less-than. The SBC has affirmed the value of women and their God-given roles at its annual meetings. Personally, I’ve experienced nothing but support in the things God calls me to do. If I get invited to speak at a women’s ministry event, my husband is my biggest cheerleader. Not only him, but several other men have supported me in my seminary degree, writing, and in equipping other women. I’m not only supported in the “seen” ways God calls me to serve, but in the unseen ways too. My husband realizes the great value in my calling as a wife, mom, and keeper of our home. Between church, seminary, associational work, and more, I could go on and on about the support I’ve been given as a woman in the SBC. I understand not everyone has this story, but we can’t only hear the negative stories. My narrative needs to be out there, too. I’m a woman. God has gifted me to teach His Word through speaking and writing, and I’ve been given wonderful support (by both men and women).

The SBC isn’t trying to kick women out of all leadership. I get really tired of how many try to paint the complementarian side as “Women can’t be in church leadership.” I don’t think that’s a fair picture. It’s that women can’t be in pastoral leadership. That word matters. I’m the leader of our church’s women’s ministry. Doesn’t that make me “in leadership”? We also have women who lead in our children’s ministry, VBS, Operation Christmas Child, and hospitality team. They’re leading in our church, but they’re not serving as pastors. Pastors are leaders, and important ones at that, but this whole “women in church leadership” wording is simply not true. There are a million ways women can serve in the church. Pastoral leadership is for qualified men only, but that doesn’t mean SBC churches don’t need women and their gifts (they do!).

Complementarianism doesn’t mean women can’t teach Scripture (and can’t do it well). I saw a joke along the lines of, “I don’t have time to debate if women can exegete Scripture or not.” Again, that’s not what this issue is about. Scripture doesn’t call women to be pastors, but it never says women don’t have the gift of teaching. As a woman, I believe God has given me this gift. Is my audience different because I’m a woman? Yes! My primary audience is women, and you won’t find me behind a pulpit on a Sunday morning. But does that make my teaching gift less-than? Nope. Also, does it mean I should take this gift less seriously? Not at all. When I get to teach God’s Word, I try to handle it with the same care as my husband does on a Sunday morning. This isn’t because I’m trying to be a pastor (I’m not!). It’s because I love God’s Word and believe it should be treated with great care no matter who is teaching or who the audience is. Actually, this is one of my “beefs” with women’s ministry stuff. My husband will get to sit under expositional teaching with his Bible open at a men’s conference, while I’m sitting under something more self-helpish, wondering, “Are we gonna open our Bibles?” So yes, women can teach Scripture. But no, Scripture doesn’t allow us to be called or function as pastors. Both can be true. Also, when women do teach Scripture, they should handle it with care.

Words matter. The SBC will vote on another amendment to clarify what we’ve believed since its foundation (only men as qualified by Scripture can be pastors). One side of this debate is, “It doesn’t matter.” Some will say that if a church calls a woman a “children’s pastor” but she’s not actually functioning as a pastor, then so what? It does matter. If this is simply an issue of informing and creating awareness, then let’s do that. But both the wording and the function matter.

We can care about multiple things at once. One argument I hear against this amendment is, “Well, what about the abuse?” or “What about the men who aren’t qualified?” We can care about all of these things! We can fight against the injustice of abuse and make sure it doesn’t happen in our churches. We can study the Scripture that gives the qualifications for pastors and ensure we’re holding the men called to that role to those standards. And we can do those things all while caring about complementarianism. 

I’m a complementarian woman, and I’m not oppressed. My life is full of joy. It’s joyous when I teach God’s Word to women, but it’s equally joyous when I care for my home and serve my family. My husband is an incredible leader of both our home and church. He’s beyond selfless and cares for my family and me in a million ways (and our church too). The longer I’m married and the longer I serve in the church, the more I see that God’s design for men and women is beautiful. When the church and home function as God calls them to, there’s joy, blessing, and peace. 

And finally, I love the SBC! I’m excited to gather in Orlando with fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. One thing my husband and I always notice, though, is that the actual SBC is very different from Twitter SBC (or X, but I still refuse to call it that). Twitter SBC may make you think all we do is fight, but that’s not the case. If you’ve never been to the SBC before, there’s unity, praise, and fellowship. Yes, motions will be made, discussions will be had, and votes will be cast. But more than that, we’ll get freebies in the exhibition hall, catch up with ministry friends, rejoice at what God has done in missions. Once again, we’ll join together for the sake of spreading the Gospel to the nations!